Trouble
12:23 p.m. - 2004-08-12
�Do you know we�ve been fighting every two or three days?�
�Yes.�
Honestly, it really scares me. Last night, there was talk of taking a break or just breaking up. This morning, I couldn�t remember why we had been arguing, but I have a headache as proof.
I don�t know what�s going to happen with us. He brought up a lot of things that cause problems in our relationship like communication. I never tell him what�s wrong. When he asks, I always say �nothing.� It�s not that I don�t know what�s wrong with me, I just can�t explain. I could explain it if I had time to write it out. I just can�t blurt it out. I wish I could tell him everything, but every time I try, I�m afraid that I�ll say something that�ll make everything fall apart.
He also said that if we don�t move in together three years after I graduate, it�d be time to call it quits. That bothered me for two reasons. The first is that he wouldn�t want to wait. I mean, I don�t want to wait that long, but if I had to, I would. The other reason is that why would it take so long? Which brings up the next issue, I�m going to have a college degree and finding a job will be a little easier than it is for him. So moving to El Paso would cause problems in that area because jobs are scarce.
When I remember why we had fought this morning, I went around the whole problem about three times. Maybe it is time to call it quits. I kept thinking that last night and I wanted to yell into the phone, �Why the hell did you ask me to marry you? Why did you get my hopes up, thinking that I might actually not be alone? When I was perfectly fine with being alone the rest of my life, why?�
I�ll fill you in on the rest, gotta go.
Getting linked and saying adios - 2005-01-28
What's going on... - 2005-01-26
Fixed - 2005-01-21
Sex ed - 2005-01-19
And still on the same subject - 2005-01-18
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